Think Basis It's Good For Business

In an industry with as many gray areas as Internet marketing there are bound to be some disagreements. From time to time tempers flare, and a heated discussion ensues about what is, or is not, the appropriate way to handle something. But, in the interest of adding a little more fuel to the dying fire, I wanted to throw in my two cents about the tendency some people have to fall back on petty name calling instead of engaging in a legitimate discussion. In short: no matter how much you might dislike someone, if they’re backing their opinions up with facts and examples they are not a bully.

On the one hand you could lazily define bullying based on some lame text book, but I’d rather define it based on those 80s teen movies we all know and love. The bully was the guy who shamelessly (and without cause) picked on the protagonist just because he could. He’d knock the books out of some nerd’s hand and then high five his friends because acting like a dick is totally cool. They’d instigate a fight just because they were stronger and then they’d totally humiliate some poor kid who’d just moved in from New Jersey.

But, since people rarely behave like this in the real world, the idea of bullying seems to have been co-opted and abused by people who don’t want to engage in actual debate. Sure, there’s no reason to dignify petty name calling or baseless insults (which are often the cost of online anonymity), but when someone stands up to you and offers a well reasoned argument or opinion, turning around and calling them a bully is just a crutch. There’s a huge difference between being outspoken about your opinions and going out of your way to start a fight with someone. There’s nothing bullying about someone calling you out and saying they disagree. In fact, it’s exactly those types of comments that help keep you honest and relevant.

Sometimes it’s easier to whine about how people are bullies than it is to stick up for your opinion, especially if you happen to be wrong. And let’s face it, most of us are wrong from time to time. The true leaders in the industry are the ones who embrace dissent and are not afraid to admit when they’ve stepped out of line and extend an olive branch to whomever they might have judged unfairly.

Does bullying take place online? Absolutely. But aside from the ever present comments from trolls, the reality is it’s usually a whole lot more subtle. Genuine online bullying is a lot more like bullying in real life. People don’t just run around dumping spaghetti on someone while an entire restaurant laughs at the poor sap’s misfortune. However, people most certainly do say nasty things about each other behind their back and encourage friends to do the same.

Real bully blogging isn’t about passing along your opinion or responding to someone you disagree with, it’s about using your audience to attack someone who has done absolutely nothing wrong. A good example would be the “mommy blogger” who threatened to say negative things about Crocs if she didn’t get a free pair of shoes. That’s just blackmail and intimidation. Compare this with the commenter who takes the time to explain why they disagree with something you’ve written, or something someone in the industry is doing, and it’s pretty easy to distinguish dissenting opinions from outright bullying.

There’s nothing wrong with being vocal, in fact sometimes it might be one of your biggest assets, but the next time you get into a disagreement with someone who says, “I think you’re full of shit…and here’s why,” maybe you should hold off on calling them a bully until you actually listen to what they’re saying.

Just something to think about.

If you’re good at something it’s okay to have a bit of an ego about it. Anyone who’s competitive would probably agree that a great deal of strength can be drawn from a person’s belief in their own abilities. You don’t see a lot of boxers going into their pre-fight press conferences telling reporters they’re going to get knocked out a couple rounds into the fight. If they don’t go into the fight confident in themselves, they’re not going to be very successful. However, imagine that same fighter has been winning for a couple years and is now surrounded by people who are constantly telling him he’s at the top of his game and he’s finally made it. Do you think that fighter is going to stay on top for very long?

Weak boxing analogy aside, the main point is there’s a fine line between having a healthy amount of confidence (good ego) and taking your ego to the point of outright arrogance. And, in an industry that manages to manufacture faux celebrities like very few others, some SEOs seem to fall victim to believing their own hype. If enough people treat you like you’re on a pedestal, it’s very easy to start thinking you actually belong there and forget there’s always something you can still learn.

Buying Into the Hype

A couple common traits of the SEO Super Ego are:

1) They are incapable of making a mistake (regardless of what “lesser” SEOs might say)

2) Anyone who says something negative is just hating on them because they’re “famous.” And,

3) They don’t need the community, the community needs them

As a relative newcomer, I’ve been fortunate enough to have a few different mentors who are continuously striving to learn new things and maintain their place at the top. They enjoy debating different tactics and never seem threatened by someone offering a different perspective. On the flip side of that coin, however, anyone that has gone to more than a couple conferences can probably name a few SEOs who might not be so willing to go out of their way to talk to a noob. The ones who tend to only be seen talking to the people they feel have already achieved a similar celebrity status.

I’d venture to say the vast majority of “SEO Stars” have managed to stay well grounded and continue to contribute to the community in a way that benefits a lot of different people. But, it seems like the structure of the industry also creates a slippery slope for the shameless self-promoters in the group, with each additional speaking engagement making them feel more and more like the ultimate authority on whatever topic they discuss.

Celebrity Isn’t Necessarily Achievement Based

The above figure shows a highly unscientific display of “SEO Stars” by achievement

The irony seems to be that with so much of the actual work everyone does taking place in private, sometimes charisma can be confused with talent, and you end up with huge personalities resting on non-existent laurels. The important thing to remember is that unlike the Hollywood model of stardom, in SEO, celebrity is not synonymous with success.

So, is letting the celebrity status go to your head really excusable? Or should you just be grateful you’ve gotten some recognition and leave it at that?

A Simple Benefit to Staying Grounded

In a recent post on “Stroking the SEO Ego,” Chris Hooley made an excellent point about taking the time to invest in some of the up and comers who might be aspiring to reach a higher level;

“There’s a lot more bang for your buck in making a big impression on the next big thing, instead of getting in line to impress the current big thing.”

People like to be liked, and by reaching out to the people who look up to you, you’re actually building a great amount of equity over the long run.

Obviously, as a part of the non-famous, I’m biased toward thinking the approach Chris mentions is probably the best. But, I’m interested in hearing what other people have to say. Do you agree that there are out of control egos in the industry? Also, which “SEO Stars” are consistently contributing to the community in a positive way?